How do I stop feeling stressed if there is something to be done?

Discussion in 'PUBLIC: Discuss the GTD Methodology' started by Travello, Aug 16, 2018.

  1. Travello

    Travello Registered

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    Hey guys. How do I stop feeling stressed over the fact that there is something in the system that needs to be done?
     
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  2. ssksogaard

    ssksogaard Registered

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    If the fact that you have actions that is actionable stresses you, I don't see how it could ever change...
    Though.. The reason is stresses you, may hold the answer to help..
    E.g.:
    If, the stress comes for not knowing if the action you are doing is the right one - you might need better review of the system.
    If, its the colossal number of actionable actions, you simply could delegate or ask for help reducing the actionable actions..

    Just my thoughts, as this is some of the things what helped/helps me..
    I believe its a matter of finding out why it stresses you..

    Update; or do as vino:
     
    Last edited: Aug 16, 2018
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  3. vino

    vino Registered

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    I also have had the same feeling. Nowadays, I am ruthless in transferring things to someday/maybe list. This has helped me, not to bite off more than I can chew and thereby can keep the stress at acceptable levels.
     
  4. bcmyers2112

    bcmyers2112 Registered

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    Can you explain more about why that stresses you?
     
  5. TesTeq

    TesTeq Registered

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    Do the Weekly Review.
     
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  6. bcmyers2112

    bcmyers2112 Registered

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    Without knowing more, I think we're just spitballing. That's why I asked @Travello for clarification.

    I think @ssksogaard was on the right track. The solution is going to depend in large part on what's causing the stress.

    For example, if @Travello is finding resistance to using his lists because his next actions are not truly physical, visible actions (something ill-defined such as "set a meeting") then the thing to do would be to better clarify those actions (like "call/email so-and-so to set meeting").

    If he is overwhelmed with long lists of actions he is not committed to accomplishing in the near term, then some actions and/or projects should be shunted to someday/maybe. Having clearly defined AOFs can help determine what's important now and what can wait.

    If the items in his next actions lists don't seem like the right ones to move forward on his projects, then some application of the natural planning process is in order.

    If the issue is actions he doesn't feel like he knows how to accomplish, then the solution might be to clarify what he'd need to do to gain that knowledge. For example, if he's been assigned a task by his boss (assuming he has one) that he's unclear on, then first he needs to call/email/talk to his boss.

    You see what I mean? There are so many different possibilities for what the sticking point could be that it's hard to come up with a good suggestion without knowing more.

    I'm not trying to put you on the spot, @Travello. I'd like to help -- I think most of us would -- but I think it would be useful to know more so we can tailor our suggestions to what you need.
     
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  7. kelstarrising

    kelstarrising Kelly

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    Get comfortable with the idea that your lists won't be down to zero until the day you die.
     
  8. Oogiem

    Oogiem Registered

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    And they still aren't at zero then, they are just no longer your lists but your heirs' lists.
     
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  9. kelstarrising

    kelstarrising Kelly

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    Exactly!
     
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  10. TesTeq

    TesTeq Registered

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    "Fortunately" many items on these lists become meaningless...
     
  11. Oogiem

    Oogiem Registered

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    I guess it depends. When I inherited the farm and the lists that came with it from my mom they all were still relevant and had to get added to my own lists.
     
  12. TesTeq

    TesTeq Registered

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    Yes, I agree. If you want to continue Projects, you inherit them. But it's your choice - you can abandon them. And some obligations and commitments cease to exist.
     
  13. Sarahsuccess

    Sarahsuccess Registered

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    A. Are you viewing the next action list as a tool that you create and control, to serve you, and empty your head, or are you viewing it as an externally imposed master commanding you around?

    B. Do you think you have to do each task perfectly?

    C. Are there too many new and hard things on the list? Should some be moved to a someday/maybe list?

    all of the above, some of the above or none of the above?

    Sarah
     
  14. Oogiem

    Oogiem Registered

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    Not many on a farm. The same things have to be done as long as it's a working farm no matter who the current caretaker is.
     
  15. TesTeq

    TesTeq Registered

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    1. You can continue to work on an inherited farm or sell it. It's your choice.
    2. Personal projects (for example "Get new prescription glasses" or "Buy a new hat") of the person who passed away become meaningless. Sad but true.
     
  16. Oogiem

    Oogiem Registered

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    True, but the farm projects don't really go away. In most cases the new owner will still have to do them. If the former owner can provide some of the help it can make the projects go faster. My mom got projects and info from the folks we bought the farm from and I in turn got projects and info from her files. I fully expect to leave project plans and info to the next caretaker. Some things don't really change much and need tending over multiple lifetimes.
     
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  17. TesTeq

    TesTeq Registered

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    Yes, I understand. It's great to hear about such dedication to preserve tradition and continue longterm projects.
    Big farms were nationalized (ie. destroyed) in Poland after World War II and then privatized after 1989 - leaving people who worked and lived there without jobs...
     
  18. bcmyers2112

    bcmyers2112 Registered

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    Again, I think the answer depends on what is the source of the stress. If just having items on the list is what's causing stress, then the advice from @kelstarrising is on the money. But if the stress is due to an overwhelming number of items on the list, or the nature of the things that need to be done, those are different problems.
     
  19. Loïs

    Loïs Registered

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    Are you comfortable with what you're doing in the moment?
    I might be stressed by the fact that action B is not being done, but if the reason I'm not doing action B is because I'm doing action A and would feel even more stressed by the fact that action A is not being done, then it means I'm doing the right thing.
    It's the idea that GTD gives you tools to feel OK about what you are not doing.
    Therefore although the current situation is annoying, it is as good as it can be right now. Hopefully you quickly get your "runway" clear and you can focus on more long-term, less stressful project.

    And if you stress about not doing an action that is the most important action that needs to be done, well it's your brain doing its job!
     
  20. OF user

    OF user Registered

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    Unless you go to the "hot" place. Then you keep your lists.
     
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